2014-06-11 Wednesday

Rain has begun to come down again. It seems to be getting harder by the minute. I feel for the grounds maintenance to have been cutting grass and trimming during the lull in rain. I remember my college summers when I worked as a Greensman on Louisville’s Shawnee Golf Course. If I were cutting a green when the rain began, I would do my best to complete the job before moving to shelter. Usually, my clothes ended up soaked. When the rain stopped and the sun began to shine, it seemed that steam arose from my wet clothes as they dried.

Shawnee Golf Course: one of the greens for which I was responsible

Having my toenails from yesterday was a wonderful experience. Considering my initial Veterans Affairs medical appointment for toenail trimming was last February, were extremely long. So long that my right big toe punched a hole in my house slippers. And, the only shoes I could get into the go outside were opened-toed sandals. The podiatrist who trimmed my nails did an excellent job. Because I am diabetic, she will return on a monthly basis not only to check my toenails, but the condition of my feet. I wish I had known about these service years ago.

I wish the rest of me felt as good as my toes feel. I’m still almost constantly nauseous. The only thing that helps is a teaspoon of baking soda dissolved in a glass of water and drunk. My left leg remains painful and weak. There are a lot of shores that I have been unable to do, including washing clothes, putting dishes in the dishwasher, general cleaning, and fixing myself good meals. I have plenty of food; I just am unable to get to it.

The Kitty Kids have been quite happy since I was able to purchase their favorite wet cat food and treats on June 2^nd. Unfortunately, the food will not last until the end of the month and as of right now I have only about $15 in the bank. 

Sugar with her favorite treats

Alex with his favorite treats

Midnight would prefer to run and play than eat treats. (Not all the time, of course)

I am unable to pay my electric bill. Today I finally got to talk to someone at Louisville Gas and Electric. She told me that I cannot make any arrangements now but must wait until after June 17th (when the payment is due) and I receive a “disconnect notice.” That makes absolutely no sense to me. I would much rather make arrangements now without risking having my electricity and thus my oxygen got off.

My hope in all this financial shit is that the United States Department of Education will refund me all of the money they have taken from my social security check this year once my disability is recognized. Of course, I don’t really expect that the bureaucracy will do that with lots of negotiation. I have tried several times this week to reach the D.O.E. by telephone and on the Federal Student Aid website without finding out anything. ‘[SIGH]

One final comment: I have been having extreme difficulty breathing the past couple of days. Between that and my weak leg, I have spent most of my time connected to the CPAP, sleeping.  It isn’t that my blood oxygen level is low—the pulse oximeter read 95% most of the time—it is that I have difficulty breathing through my nose so I’ve breath through my mouth. I have been doing that almost all of my life. I suppose it has to do with the allergens I have been exposed to in the many river valleys in which I have lived.

Please

We are in serious need.

Childhood Memories/Old Photos

Me (age 3?) at Christmas

My mother and I began reminiscing during my daily telephone call to her. I described the old picture (above) and mom told me that it was taken at my Aunt Alma and Uncle Frank’s house when they lived two doors from us. She thinks that I was about three years old.

Uncle Frank (Frankie Joe to me) and me

She remembered that Uncle Frank Chickens and ducks in his back yard at that house. I was frightened of them when I was very young. By the time I was or so I had lost my fear to the point that I would go into their pen and feed them.(See below).

Frankie Joe's chickens and me

We also talked about the first dog that I ever knew. He was named by my sister, Debbie close, Boo-Boo.  Boo-Boo was quite protective of Debbie and me. Mom would put Debbie into a playpen on our front yard and I would play in the yard beside her. Boo-Boo was always there and put himself between Debbie and me and anyone walking on the sidewalk in front of our house. If someone came into the yard Boo-Boo would stand between them and us, growling.

Sister Debbie and me

I wish I had a photograph of Boo-Boo, but I don't

Day Forty-six

There are two days of the 24,000+ that I have lived that I can remember parts of minute-by-minute: November 22, 1963 and September 11, 2001. My Nick's Bytes blog for today will document the latter. I have already documented the former. 

This morning as I was remembering those minutes that began for me at about 9:20 a.m. when my mother telephoned me and told me to turn on my TV. I was stunned and remained watching TV for about another eight hours. 

The collapse of the two World Trade Center towers, with the cloud of smoke and debris shooting into the air like a descending mushroom cloud had me shaking. It took years of remembering those moments before I understood how they impinged upon and brought to mind my early fears of being killed by a nuclear bomb. I believe only those who lived in the beginning days of the nuclear age and cold war can understand what it is like to live under the constant threat of annihilation, of being vaporized, fried, or poisoned by radiation. The collapse of  towers reminded me of the films I had seen of nuclear bombs. I identified with the victims of the September 11, 2001, atrocity.

My lunch from meals-on-wheels just arrived: it isn't the expected warm meal but a box lunch. The volunteer reluctantly informed me that I'll no longer be receiving hot meals but box lunches because the recipients on my delivery route number now less than ten and  it isn't cost effective to keep less than ten meals warm. 

I don't understand that reason. I do understand that my life has quickly and radically changed since I now have no caregiver and no warm lunches. 

My trip to the pawnshop the shylocks another $50.00 went OK. I had no trouble engaging the clutch of my CRV, even though my left leg is still weak. I did find walking difficult, especially uphill across the parking lot to the pawnshop. Thankfully, a Good Samaritan came along and assisted me in keeping my balance.

My leg is much more gimpy now than it was this morning. I suppose driving did do something to me. The good news is that Anne and Lyndia dropped by this evening, emptied the litter box and did some grocery shopping for me.